I’ve gone a little quiet on here – at least in terms of writing about where I’m at.
I’ve had a lot of ‘missing Mum’ nights this week. Nights when I end up folded over, crying, silently screaming, wanting Mum back. It’s weird because before this week, I’d stopped thinking of Mum every day in that same way that I had been in the weeks since Mum died.
Tomorrow marks three months since Mum died. Tomorrow I’m moving out of halls. I’m excited to move and I’m ready to move. It is weird, though, because it will be the first place I’ve lived that Mum hasn’t seen.
The place I’m currently living is the place I’ve lived for the majority of Mum’s illness. There are a lot of memories in this room. This block is where I was when I heard that Mum died.
I’m ready to get away from here and make a new start. It’s also hard breaking away, though, because moving forward and rebuilding my life means leaving Mum behind. Mum will forever remain in 2015, at least in physical form.